"Okay Dani, I need you to sit down and have good hard serious conversation with yourself. Don't say I don't know, do not feel defeated, do not feel as if any path you want is closed and above all else do not doubt that you are capable of achieving great things in this life. This is your crossroads, this is where you choose the path that you walk for the remainder of your life, or at least until you reach the next crossroads. So what will it be? you are strong, you are young, smart, beautiful, healthy and whole. Do not squander the gifts you have been given by the universe. So I ask again, What will it be? Choose your path now."

Can I choose my path? Or will I meet defeat round every bend, come to a wall every time I turn around. It seems that's how it's always been and yet here I still am. I will not quit until I am dead. I am stubborn like that. I will not give up while a breath still lies in my chest and my heart beats it's rhythmic beat. I am bound for things I still yet do not understand and yet I know it's true, I've received the signs I've asked for every time, the last being the strongest most reassuring yet. I am on the right path but still here I am and I must choose. Do I continue my current path and pursue my greatness at whatever the cost may be? Perhaps even that of my own life? Or do I pursue a more mundane path, boring, frustrating but safe?....I doubt I could tolerate it for very long. Danger is something I love and yet have a distaste towards, in a way it almost lets me know what I am doing will incur some kind of change. What kind is hard to assume. Will it be the change I hope for, work towards and dream will one day happen? Or will the mundane atrocities of human life wash it all away like the tides on a beach?

"Trust in your mother ... trust in your true mother."

From this day forth I am no man's slave, I am a warrior
From this day forth I breath life, not chaos
From this day forth wherever my steps may lead is where I go, I fallow no man's path
Today there has been a great death amongst the spirits of old and upon us a gift bestowed by the passing. Let the energy flow back into all, feel it course through the veins of the universe and into thine very own hearts and through it feel all else who would do so to. Become one with the universe and let it flow through you into all you do.

A gift given to me so I may never lose myself again; a key back to reality from whatever far reaches of my mind I may wonder into. It seems so simple as I say it over and over and over again in mind, my mind's tongue feeling out every curve of every letter and there it is a tingling sensation like licking a battery, a surging energy that's a sensation to the soul and I know it's full of power, much more than I know I understand and so I keep it hidden deep where only I dare venture to find it for who would be mad enough to follow me into that deep descending darkness that dares grip your heart, mind and soul tighter with every lingering step...who I ask?...you? And then there was a feeling like falling off the edge of the world.